Search 8,871+ Chuck Norris Facts

It should be blatantly obvious to all, but it still bears repeating: never, ever, EVER ask Chuck Norris to take his boots off when he enters your house.

The secret to the B-2 Stealth Bomber's technology is it contains Chuck Norris's beard. Only 21 were ever built as Chuck Norris has only shaved 21 times.

Errol Flynn once tried to grow a Chuck Norris beard. Which of course is why he died such a brutally violent death.

The most difficult thing about making the Total Gym commercials was keeping Christie Brinkley from tearing off her clothes and begging Chuck Norris, "Take me, Chuck Norris, you magnificient bearded stallion!"

Chuck Norris' beard has the density of a dying sun.

Bears have to put up "Don't feed Chuck Norris" signs.

Chuck Norris's beard is the eigth wonder of the world.

Do not stare at Chuck Norris' beard, or it may feel threatened and leap off his face and smother you to death.

Chuck Norris once cast his fishing line into the Bearing Sea and caught a 176 lb halibut from his patio lawn chair in southern Oklahoma.

Chuck Norris' face was going to be on Mt. Rushmore, but the granite wasn't tough enough for his beard

The rope that they made to hang Saddam Hussien was made out of Chuck Norris' beard hair. It never released its grip.

Chuck Norris was hiking and suddenly came face to face with a huge Grizzley bear. After a desperate foot chase, Chuck caught the bear, slapped it stupid and told it "don't EVER do that again".

7 seniors took Chuck Norris Snipe hunting in the woods when he was a freshman in high school. He killed 19 Snipes, a grizzly bear and 3 timber wolves. Oddly, the 7 seniors are still missing.

Chuck Norris can retract his beard, wolverine-style, at will. It makes that metallic sound and everything.

Zeus from Greek myth fathered many children, has a beard, and killed his own father. No, Zeus is not Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris killed Zeus for copying him.

Chuck Norris' beard is like the facehugger from Alien.

Chuck Norris was able to defeat Superman because his beard is made of pure kryptonite.

If Chuck Norris and a Grizzley bear go after the same salmon, Chuck will be the one having smoked salmon for dinner.

Chuck Norris' beard also works part-time as his pubes.

A girl asked Chuck Norris to shave his beard. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked her, and she grew taller and her hair grew shorter. That girl is now Justin Bieber.