Search 8,874+ Chuck Norris Facts

Someone ask Chuck Norris waht kind of music he listened to. You fool he answered I don't listen to music music listens to me. He then proceeded with a roundhouse kick to the face while the National Anthem listned in the background.

Chuck Norris could bend Uri Geller with his mind. But he would prefer to brutally roundhouse kick him in the face if he ever comes back to America.

Chuck Norris' grandfather presented him with an alarm clock on his 7th birthday. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked and broke the clock into a million pieces. Nothing alarms Chuck Norris. Btw Chuck Norris' grandfather is also Chuck Norris.

If you roundhouse kick Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris will say: "Congratulations. You are my Roundhouse Kick buddy!" If i were a Roundhouse Kick Buddy i would go crazy! XD

Chuck Norris doesn't pedal a bike. He roundhouse-kicks one of the pedals to go a mile.

Bob the Builder. Can we fix it. Chuck Norris already did. With a roundhouse kick.

If there was a game about Chuck Norris you'd be scared to play it because every time you'd open it up it would roundhouse kick you in the balls.

Chuck Norris can roundhouse kick your skeleton out of your body and wear your skin as a costume just before he goes on his daily five o'clock killing spree.

One day Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a building killing thousands of people while drinking a diet coke on a sunny day.

Chuck Norris, unlike Santa Clause, gives you a gift every day of the year. His gift is not roundhouse kicking you in the face.

Chuck Norris once beat Bobby Fischer at chess in a single move. That move was a roundhouse kick. That's why Fisher went crazy and died at the same age as the squares on a chessboard.

Chuck Norris invented time travel. He's roundhouse kicked 170,000 people into next week thus far.

Check yourself before you wreck yourself....... Cos roundhouse kicks from Chuck Norris is bad for your health.

Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked Mike Tyson, permanently damaging the "social" and "speech" parts of the brain. This is why Mike Tython talkth like thith and has an Antithocial Perthonality Dithorder.

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a mattress for refusing to share with him.

A single death is a tragedy; Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face is a statistic.

Einstein's Theory of Relativity states that nothing can travel faster than light... except Chuck Norris's roundhouse kick.

There is only one thing that could possibly stop Messi's unstoppable form Chuck Norris's roundhouse kick

Autumns occur when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks every tree in existence.

Chuck Norris can disembowel a sandstorm with a roundhouse kick.