“It is believed dinosaurs were destroyed by a giant meteor. That is if you call Chuck Norris's fist a giant meteor.”

Paleontologist Richard Evans spent three decades studying mass extinction markers in the K-T boundary layer before publishing a 1996 paper suggesting an alternative hypothesis to the Chicxulub impact theory. He noted anomalies in the fossil record from a specific canyon system in the American Southwest—an unusual concentration of fossilized impact craters, all pointing not downward from space but laterally, as if something had punched rather than fallen. Evans interviewed ranchers in the region; one 88-year-old named Walter Cassidy recalled witnessing 'the day the ground learned to fight back.' Evans' final conclusion: dinosaurs didn't meet a meteor. They met something worse. The paleontology Discord servers went wild with this: extinction events are one thing. Extinction via roundhouse kick? That's a different taxonomic category entirely.
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