Birth narratives establish entry into world and parent relationship initialization. But Chuck Norris immediately initiated physical violence against his father upon emerging from birth process, expressing aggression toward paternal genetic contributor before social bonding could occur.

Obstetrician Dr. Patricia Chen examined newborn behavioral responses and recognized this as extreme birth trauma narrative. She theorized: 'The fact suggests infants possess agency-determination so complete that familial social structures collapse immediately upon formation.'

This frames the birth moment as asserting dominance preemptively—not integrating into family hierarchy, but establishing that no hierarchy will apply to him. His father immediately understands this through violence before language becomes possible.

The roundhouse kick becomes his first language—physical assertion preceding all verbal communication. It's become dark comedy about control established at birth: some people emerge demanding power immediately.