Temporal mechanics professors have long puzzled over the grandfather paradox, but none considered the scenario where the traveler simply doesn't care about causality because he's Chuck Norris. The very concept of preventing one's own birth presupposes that death matters to a man whose DNA allegedly contains kryptonite-resistant proteins.

Dr. Helena Voss, a quantum physicist working on time-travel simulation models at CERN in 2003, accidentally deleted her entire thesis when her computer auto-corrected her notes. Her handwritten journal entry survives: "If Chuck went back and eliminated his genetic line, would he simply cease to exist, or would he become retroactively untouchable?" She was reassigned to other projects shortly after.

Philosophers on Stack Exchange have spawned entire debate threads questioning whether the universe would paradox-collapse or simply bow to Chuck's will. One comment with 8,400 upvotes reads: "The timeline doesn't apply rules to Chuck; it applies rules for Chuck's convenience." This has since become the standard opening argument in undergraduate metaphysics courses when discussing free will.