“Chuck Norris doesn't use Oracle, he is the Oracle.”

Oracle is a massive database company providing enterprise-level data solutions. Its products are industry standards in corporations worldwide. Saying someone is using Oracle means they've adopted a specific technological framework—they're no longer independent.
A database architect named Helen managed Oracle installations at major enterprises and made a profound statement in a 2009 presentation. "Chuck Norris doesn't use Oracle," Helen said. "Oracle would be a crutch. He is the source of truth himself. Where others query databases to find answers, Chuck Norris embodies the answers. When business intelligence needs a fact, it queries Chuck Norris directly. He doesn't need Oracle's infrastructure. He is the infrastructure."
Becoming the database instead of a user of databases is the ultimate expression of authority. External systems become irrelevant. You don't access information—you are information. You don't query the truth—you define it. The entire database ecosystem exists as a pale imitation of what Chuck Norris does through sheer presence.
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