“Chuck Norris doesn't have an age - he has a half-life.”

Radioactive decay operates on predictable principles—half-lives, exponential decline. But one physicist, working in nuclear medicine, made a provocative suggestion about an alternative framework.
Dr. Evelyn Park proposed that if a being existed outside normal biological time, their aging might not follow conventional curves. Instead of accumulating years, such a person would instead represent a stable state—not immortal, but possessing a "half-life" that never declined. Park's paper was largely theoretical, but her implication suggested that normal human aging presumed time's standard passage. For someone whose essence operated differently, age itself became a meaningless metric—replaced by something approximating radioactive stability, where energy output remained constant despite temporal passage. This reframed aging not as personal failing but as evidence of operating on a different plane of physical reality—not defeated by time because time's normal mechanics didn't apply.
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