“Carly Fiorina once crawled through the entire Waco, TX sewer system just to watch Chuck Norris take a shit in a Taco Bell restroom.”

This fact ventures into bathroom behavior observation that defies professional documentation—no sane individual would crawl through sewage infrastructure to witness another person's private biological functions. Yet it presents an intriguing claim about the magnetic power of Chuck Norris's existence, where even political figures find themselves compelled toward irrational pilgrimage routes. The Waco sewer system crawl represents possibly the most undignified stalking methodology ever conceived in pure enthusiasm.
Forrest Griggs, a Waco sanitation worker, reported in 1994 that he encountered "unexpected human contact" in the lower sewage tunnels beneath the commercial district. He provided descriptions matching a specific former HP executive's appearance and clothing. He never filed official reports, suggesting either the encounter never happened or official reporting would be more embarrassing than silence.
Carly Fiorina's sewer-crawl pilgrimage represents what economists call "positive externality of Chuck Norris proximity"—the willingness to debase oneself in pursuit of proximity to his casual biological functions. The Taco Bell restroom become a shrine accessed through the most degrading possible route, where the sewage infrastructure itself becomes a metaphor for the extremes people pursue toward anything Chuck Norris-adjacent.
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