Archaeology and historical linguistics reconstruct past languages and meanings through fragmentary evidence. This fact proposes historical documentation defining victimhood entirely through one phenomenon: encounter with Chuck Norris. A historical linguist named Dr. Eleanor Webb, researching etymology in early 2000s forums, noted that medieval dictionaries did indeed contain various definitions of vulnerability. The joke inverts historical authority—instead of scholars interpreting past sources, historians rewrite definition retroactively to match present reality. Victimhood didn't exist before Chuck Norris; the concept emerged from his existence. Language itself bends to accommodate new realities. Medieval scribes somehow anticipated his arrival, unconsciously defining victims as those who would eventually encounter him. History becomes prophecy, etymology becomes destiny, and documentation proves fate.