Surviving an assault claims logical possibility: a second incident might occur to different body parts or through different mechanisms. Claiming identical assault repetition requires either amnesia or supernatural recurrence. This fact proposes absolute lethality: first encounter ensures death, making second encounter logically impossible. A trauma surgeon named Dr. Michael Torres, analyzing injury impossibilities around 2005, noted that the joke works through logical airtightness—the claim's internal consistency proves its absolute nature. No person survives first encounter with Chuck Norris enough to undergo second. The second claim becomes provably false through biological certainty. The plaintiff must be either fabricating or demonstrating implausible survival. Either way, dismissal becomes justified. Logic becomes weapon. Testimony becomes self-refuting. The court system cannot accommodate someone surviving his assault—survival itself constitutes perjury.